HPN Movie Series: Chill Factor (Skeet/Cuba), Thur @ 2200 EST

Health insurance rip off lying FDA big bankers buying
Fake computer crashes dining
Cloning while they're multiplying
Fashion shoots with Beck and Hanson
Courtney Love, and Marilyn Manson
You're all fakes
Run to your mansions
Come around
We'll kick your ass in

Postby Bob511 » Tue May 29, 2018 8:20 pm

I think I'm going to watch Pulgasari later tonight.
universe, you can't play the willfully ignorant, but partisan bleeding heart
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Postby Bob511 » Wed May 30, 2018 1:50 am

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universe, you can't play the willfully ignorant, but partisan bleeding heart
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Postby Ampersand » Wed May 30, 2018 3:36 pm

awww yea.

awareness bump!
tomorrow night!
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Postby Ampersand » Thu May 31, 2018 2:44 pm

GALGAMETH is tonight!
Check the hpn db folder to join!
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Postby Ampersand » Thu May 31, 2018 6:29 pm

Ampersand wrote:GALGAMETH is tonight!
Check the hpn db folder to join!
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Postby Ampersand » Thu May 31, 2018 9:45 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION: Galgameth
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Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Thu May 31, 2018 9:59 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION: Galgameth
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Postby Ampersand » Thu May 31, 2018 11:48 pm

Code: Select all
[22:13] <@Ampersand_> 3
[22:13] <@Ampersand_> 2
[22:13] <@Ampersand_> 1
[22:13] <@Ampersand_> surely it's a Simon Estevez production
[22:13] <dan2> Time??
[22:13] <impdentist> excuse me, time winters?
[22:13] <Trebbers> Time Winters
[22:13] <@Ampersand_> Time: Winters
[22:13] <Trebbers> Timé
[22:13] <impdentist> ELIZABETH CHEAP
[22:13] <impdentist> HELP
[22:13] <lhs> it's pronounced timmy
[22:14] <impdentist> Stephen Macht Frei
[22:14] <dan2> oh, he's gonna get Macht tonight
[22:14] <impdentist> they really dropped us in in the middle of this
[22:14] <Trebbers> Busted for hoarding helium
[22:14] <rixxx> lol
[22:14] <@Ampersand_> John "Joe" Woo
[22:15] <rixxx> sounds like tom holland
[22:15] <Trebbers> This is how you have to meet with your HR generalist at Medieval Times
[22:15] <dan2> this director went on to direct "Orphan Horse" and "Hoovey"
[22:15] <Trebbers> What the fuck could Hoovey even be
[22:15] <Trebbers> A horse?
[22:15] <@Ampersand_> anthropomorphic vaccuum
[22:16] <Trebbers> That cloth weighs 7000 pounds
[22:16] <impdentist> you dick!
[22:16] <impdentist> wtf
[22:16] <Trebbers> haahah
[22:16] <rixxx> Ahahaha
[22:16] <dan2> I've had dreams like this
[22:16] <Trebbers> My highest knight
[22:16] <impdentist> man this dude IS high
[22:16] <Trebbers> Holy fuck that cat
[22:17] <Trebbers> Dog eared copy
[22:17] <bob511> By falling off a horse?
[22:17] <impdentist> i forgot we were done with the credits and thought Donnigold Castle was an actor's name
[22:17] <@Ampersand_> "courage and alcoholism"
[22:18] <rixxx> This kingdom is gay as hell
[22:18] <dan2> Shittlefinger
[22:18] <@Ampersand_> L. L. Cruel J
[22:18] <rixxx> nice
[22:18] <Trebbers> "Son, this is what we call 'Soft Power'
[22:19] <impdentist> is his name really LL
[22:19] <dan2> Elle L.
[22:19] <lhs> "dad, i wish i had never been rolled"
[22:19] <besoin> my download is stalling with 25 seconds left
[22:19] <impdentist> Al L.
[22:20] <impdentist> oh i forgot what this movie was
[22:20] <dan2> "It's a Skylander"
[22:20] <bob511> Ancient family legend, huh?
[22:20] <Trebbers> "You pack the weed in one end and smzzzzoke the other"
[22:20] <@Ampersand_> if it gets struck by lightning, it turns into a Munchie, child
[22:20] <dan2> they stole that thing off of the family of the blacksmith who died in Pulgasari
[22:21] <rixxx> is the dad dying?
[22:21] <Trebbers> Poison I'm afraid
[22:21] <impdentist> yeah his wound was poisoned by LL Cool J
[22:21] <impdentist> he seems remarkably ok with it
[22:21] <@Ampersand_> the Oscars beckon him to his final sleep
[22:21] <besoin> time?
[22:22] <lhs> magus snape
[22:22] <@Ampersand_> 9:00 now
[22:22] <impdentist> 900
[22:22] <dan2> 9:00
[22:22] <@Ampersand_> 9:10
[22:22] <bob511> Oh, well, guess the movie's cancelled.
[22:22] <dan2> great, now King of Tokyo is gonna be missing a piece
[22:22] <impdentist> that kid is gonna have some issues
[22:22] <besoin> can someone give me 11:00
[22:22] <dan2> you want 10 instead?
[22:23] <besoin> no, i can't scrub it to the right place very easily
[22:23] <dan2> very well
[22:23] <@Ampersand_> k we'll get you
[22:23] <dan2> trying to guess which one of these people is Time Winters
[22:23] <impdentist> what's with the high talker
[22:23] <@Ampersand_> Hal-El
[22:23] <bob511> I can't tell how much of this is the movie, and how much is the PAL speedup pitch.
[22:23] <@Ampersand_> 10:45 now
[22:24] <lhs> imdb says el el
[22:24] <dan2> 11:00
[22:24] <@Ampersand_> 11
[22:24] <lhs> the the
[22:24] <impdentist> is he an evil cat man
[22:24] <@Ampersand_> Brion Yames
[22:24] <dan2> cats are the natural enemy of the lizard
[22:25] <besoin> this performance is stolen from rickman in robin hood, right
[22:25] <Trebbers> hahahah
[22:25] <@Ampersand_> "bring out yr rats:
[22:25] <impdentist> oh man
[22:25] <dan2> All Dogs Go To Exile
[22:25] <Trebbers> "Give me that dog!"
[22:25] <Trebbers> What why
[22:25] <lhs> fuck off, dr jacobi
[22:25] <@Ampersand_> "this isn't a book. it's a conversation piece"
[22:25] <dan2> see a smart ruler would have put a book in every dog's mouth to cut down on work
[22:26] <bob511> Her parents were dogs?
[22:26] <rixxx> lol his bed
[22:26] <besoin> can someone give me 13:45
[22:26] <@Ampersand_> coming up
[22:26] <@Ampersand_> 1345
[22:27] <lhs> the the the black knight
[22:27] <besoin> thanks
[22:27] <dan2> jeez kid
[22:27] <@Ampersand_> tears on my g
[22:27] <bob511> Ha
[22:27] <dan2> take some Claritin
[22:27] <impdentist> has gooby arrived yet
[22:28] <dan2> he forms together like one of those snake fireworks you put on the ground
[22:28] <besoin> uh oh
[22:28] <impdentist> can we do an inventory of movie series homunculi
[22:28] <besoin> that just means you have to pee, bud
[22:28] <impdentist> i can't keep track of them all
[22:28] <dan2> the Ghoulies obv
[22:28] <besoin> not the mama
[22:28] <impdentist> i guess "golems" might be more accurate
[22:28] <@Ampersand_> truly upsetting
[22:28] <Trebbers> No, not it's butt
[22:29] <besoin> the gate has homunculi iirc
[22:29] <dan2> I'm not at all into body shaming but there is something unsettling about this little dude
[22:29] <Trebbers> Just make a little toupee for it and call it Alex Jones
[22:29] <@Ampersand_> was that the seam running up its back?
[22:29] <dan2> too cherubic yet...lizardly
[22:29] <dan2> basically lizards should not have flesh
[22:29] <impdentist> i gotta be honest the puppetry/costume/whatever is pretty high quality
[22:30] <@Ampersand_> it's like Barney has sex with one of the other dinosaurs and this is the spawn
[22:30] <besoin> looks like a little shaved trump
[22:31] <@Ampersand_> "it can't be. i've never even had sex!"
[22:31] <besoin> why doesn't one of these little creatures ever end up with the type of tween boy who would just pull its arms off and laugh
[22:31] <impdentist> AGH
[22:31] <@Ampersand_> welp
[22:31] <Trebbers> Let his taint air out
[22:31] <@Ampersand_> lol
[22:32] <@Ampersand_> "let... usssss.... freeeeebaaaase"
[22:32] <lhs> pretty glad that gut is covering the crotch tbh
[22:32] <dan2> can they at least get him a little towell to cover up
[22:33] <bob511> Aha
[22:33] <dan2> damn!
[22:33] <lhs> i hate you, galgameth
[22:33] <besoin> this right hand man guy is in defending your life
[22:33] <besoin> i think
[22:34] <dan2> this is the same voice, right?
[22:35] <besoin> ah, the defending your life guy is time winters
[22:36] <dan2> maybe shave his puberty stache with the jewel knife while you're at it
[22:36] <Trebbers> Yeah, how do they let that in
[22:37] <bob511> Movie seems to have complicated feelings about dogs.
[22:38] <@Ampersand_> "what if i told you the sword in my pants was metal?"
[22:39] <dan2> Bobcat Bronzethwait
[22:39] <@Ampersand_> lol
[22:40] <lhs> galgameth is going to eat the iron right out of this kid's blood
[22:40] <dan2> Galgi'd Grow
[22:41] <dan2> that one might need some work
[22:43] <dan2> dude is putting the meth in Galgameth
[22:43] <Trebbers> Thank god he's covering up
[22:43] <impdentist> barely
[22:43] <@Ampersand_> damn he buff
[22:44] <lhs> nice gallows humor
[22:45] <@Ampersand_> a little more active than Slovenia
[22:46] <dan2> Quinch?
[22:46] <lhs> yeah, the issue is that galgameth is too clean
[22:46] <besoin> hey, it's that guy from summer school
[22:46] <lhs> if they had to dub in voices, why did they choose these voices exactly
[22:47] <Trebbers> I think we got PAL speed up
[22:47] <@Ampersand_> just imagine: this movie could be even longer
[22:47] <lhs> duh john
[22:48] <dan2> mean as pig dung?
[22:48] <dan2> notoriously the meanest of all dungs
[22:48] <Trebbers> Didn't even cut the bread
[22:48] <impdentist> that is not a very sharp sword
[22:48] <impdentist> oh no not under the keg
[22:49] <lhs> don't wease the juice
[22:49] <impdentist> the thing is we know from medieval paintings that actual people used to look like this
[22:49] <@Ampersand_> hahah true
[22:49] <dan2> oh god
[22:49] <besoin> i think this is the girl from ladybugs who was always looking at butterflies
[22:50] <dan2> now Galgie is an alchie
[22:50] <bob511> What an uncomfortable conversation.
[22:51] <impdentist> practice your stage whisper dude
[22:51] <dan2> really harsh on these guys just cause they love onions
[22:51] <Trebbers> Maybe the worst ADR
[22:51] <bob511> "Can we get a little more Groucho in that reading?"
[22:52] <Trebbers> Wanna see Galg wine vomit on these dudes
[22:52] <besoin> go blow your ass?
[22:52] <dan2> go boil your ass?
[22:53] <besoin> that guy is dennis the bellboy from pretty woman
[22:53] <besoin> looks like a pretty easy cage to escape
[22:54] <@Ampersand_> her head jumps away and we discover she was a perfectly round baby galgameth body
[22:54] <impdentist> classic
[22:54] <Trebbers> oh no
[22:55] <dan2> ass eating is forbade in this kingdom
[22:55] <Trebbers> waoh
[22:55] <impdentist> whoa
[22:55] <@Ampersand_> oh wow
[22:55] <Trebbers> What year is this
[22:55] <@Ampersand_> 96?
[22:55] <Trebbers> Yeah
[22:55] <impdentist> wow you can just grab swords like that?
[22:55] <@Ampersand_> sword hack
[22:55] <lhs> john's fingers fall off
[22:56] <impdentist> jesus
[22:56] <@Ampersand_> he's benjamin buttoning
[22:56] <bob511> Can't wait until the try to imprison Nitro the American Gladiator in that cage.
[22:56] <dan2> haha
[22:57] <rixxx> i had to walk away, can i get time?
[22:57] <Trebbers> Feels like we narrowly missed a fetish subculture based on this movie
[22:57] <rixxx> thx
[22:57] <besoin> 44:15
[22:57] <lhs> three days more of this and the earth's crust will no longer be able to support galgameth's weight
[22:57] <rixxx> thanks
[22:59] <besoin> is there a whirling dervish back there
[22:59] <impdentist> is this julia stiles
[23:00] <impdentist> ugh
[23:00] <bob511> Whoa
[23:00] <bob511> "You don't understand, it was just a double entendre."
[23:00] <lhs> line your eyes up right with the point
[23:01] <impdentist> what's with the chinese guy
[23:01] <lhs> he took the polyester road
[23:02] <bob511> A little too much lye.
[23:03] <lhs> eating them back into the stone age
[23:03] <bob511> Galgie discovers Golden Corral.
[23:03] <Trebbers> Wondering if he shits BBs
[23:03] <impdentist> why
[23:03] <Trebbers> what the fuck
[23:04] <@Ampersand_> i'm gagameshing
[23:04] <lhs> too sexy for my armor
[23:04] <dan2> he sounds very pained
[23:04] <dan2> I'm assuming from his diet
[23:07] <@Ampersand_> that's actually the actor's cries to his agent
[23:07] <impdentist> he's gonna keep eating until he's the size of a planet
[23:08] <@Ampersand_> hot piss coming through
[23:08] <lhs> galgi no crimes
[23:09] <besoin> boy is this emotional
[23:10] <impdentist> oh man
[23:10] <Trebbers> ahaha
[23:10] <lhs> fuck he got daedric armor
[23:10] <rixxx> holy fuck
[23:10] <rixxx> also this music
[23:11] <bob511> "Many rebels burned to death that night."
[23:11] <impdentist> he's already pretty big
[23:12] <lhs> there's tin in anatolia
[23:13] <bob511> Always feel like an animal getting all those crumbs from the bottom of the bag.
[23:13] <@Ampersand_> a kid king
[23:14] <@Ampersand_> a king who looks like he belongs with his face shoved in a toilet?
[23:14] <lhs> no gods no masters, john
[23:14] <dan2> gonna have to get a pep talk from Galgameth on how to talk to girls
[23:14] <impdentist> eat the rich
[23:14] <@Ampersand_> "yes, ew"
[23:14] <@Ampersand_> *stabs him*
[23:14] <lhs> her bread-slapping knife
[23:15] <impdentist> weird
[23:15] == rixxx [43f474a7@gateway/web/freenode/ip.67.244.116.167] has quit [Quit: Page closed]
[23:15] <bob511> They needed a spy to see that.
[23:17] <lhs> he's going to be so exfoliated
[23:18] <dan2> Gal Got Blow'd
[23:18] <dan2> no, still doesn't work
[23:18] <bob511> "...on that model village over there."
[23:18] <Trebbers> ahaa
[23:19] <bob511> What kind of transition was that?
[23:19] <Trebbers> *thumbs down*
[23:20] <@Ampersand_> "now fetch the DJ!"
[23:20] <dan2> oh god all 3 of these voices at once
[23:20] <dan2> LL Fool'd K
[23:21] <impdentist> nobody noticed that before?
[23:21] <bob511> 'K' was better than I could come up with.
[23:21] <besoin> did anyone point out that this kid's real name is devin, and he's playing someone named davin
[23:21] <lhs> so that load of bread was harder than rope
[23:21] <lhs> loaf*
[23:22] <dan2> this guy is just a voice in his head, right?
[23:22] <bob511> Fortunately, this kid doesn't cry very often.
[23:24] <bob511> A cucumber?
[23:24] <lhs> romania has odd customs
[23:26] <@Ampersand_> nexy, please take out Doonesbury
[23:26] <besoin> the guy in the big galgy costume in this is the faun in pan's labyrinth and the fish guy in shape of water
[23:26] <bob511> Doug Jones?
[23:26] <dan2> the answer is madness
[23:26] <bob511> Wow, it is Doug Jones.
[23:26] <besoin> yes, bob
[23:27] <lhs> unsafe word
[23:29] <impdentist> there's a lot of movie left
[23:29] <@Ampersand_> galgi out sargin
[23:34] <impdentist> i'm about to have a high night
[23:34] <Trebbers>  aghahga
[23:34] <impdentist> hello is this thing on
[23:34] <@Ampersand_> yeah you need to keep your galgameth in a tank filled with only distilled water
[23:36] <@Ampersand_> offensive to lizards
[23:36] <bob511> Iron rooster?
[23:37] <besoin> this is based on a korean movie
[23:37] <besoin> In feudal Korea, the evil King becomes aware that there is a peasant rebellion being planned in the country. He steals all the iron farming tools and cooking pots from the people so that he may make weapons to fend off the peasant army. After he returns the property to the people, an old blacksmith is imprisoned and starved to death. His last creation is a tiny figurine of a monster- Pulgasari, a Godzilla-like creature that eat
[23:37] <besoin> s the creature to life, and fights with the poor, starving peasants to overthrow the corrupt monarchy.
[23:38] <dan2> *North* Korean
[23:38] <@Ampersand_> lol
[23:38] <bob511> But with a (kidnapped) South Korean director.
[23:38] <lhs> near, far, wherever you are
[23:39] <impdentist> galgi gives the thumbs up after sinking below the surface
[23:39] <@Ampersand_> in like a lion, out like a bloated direct-to-video hit
[23:39] <dan2> thankfully Tentacles comes and saves them both
[23:39] <besoin> lthough the film is a North Korean production, director Sang-ok Shin is South Korean. North Korean dictator Jong-Il Kim was a huge fan of Shin's, and since North and South Korea have technically been at war since 1951 and have no diplomatic relations, Kim had him kidnapped.
[23:40] <Trebbers> *thumbs up out of the water*
[23:41] <@Ampersand_> not true. one of my cat loves sprinkles
[23:41] <dan2> is that a tiki torch?
[23:41] <bob511> LL has not met my dumb cats.
[23:41] <dan2> lol
[23:42] <@Ampersand_> *loses other hand*
[23:42] <dan2> kind of an anticlimax after watching a 50ft monster destroy an entire army
[23:42] <@Ampersand_> damn
[23:42] <impdentist> oh shit
[23:42] <impdentist> oh i get it
[23:42] <lhs> i knew it
[23:42] <@Ampersand_> booo
[23:42] <Trebbers> Bullshit
[23:43] <lhs> you fucking coward
[23:43] <besoin> this movie is like PG-11
[23:43] <Trebbers> In the nards
[23:43] <bob511> I'm with LL.
[23:43] <besoin> your monster squad reference is registered and appreciated, treb
[23:44] <lhs> king sarah paulson
[23:44] <@Ampersand_> lol
[23:44] <impdentist> oh no are they gonna
[23:45] <bob511> Kind of ripped off the City Slickers theme?
[23:45] <impdentist> oh i forgot about the dino golem that maybe died
[23:45] <dan2> why does the sand look like oatmeal?
[23:45] <besoin> iron is always washing up on shiore
[23:45] <besoin> *shore
[23:45] <@Ampersand_> "in case we ever need to subdue the peasants"
[23:46] <impdentist> man i dunno about that
[23:46] <bob511> Oh, the whole time, and it was Galgy.
[23:46] == Trebbers [46a0777f@gateway/web/freenode/ip.70.160.119.127] has quit [Quit: Page closed]
[23:47] <bob511> Second unit director Ivan Cat.
[23:47] <@Ampersand_> Galgameth's Wardrobe provided by...
[23:47] <besoin> bozo itcus
[23:47] <dan2> Bozo Itcus
[23:48] <dan2> RIP Galgy
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Postby Ampersand » Fri Jun 01, 2018 1:36 pm

This Sunday,

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Postby laserblast » Sat Jun 02, 2018 12:32 am

is this or is this not the spa that eats, damn it
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Postby Bob511 » Sat Jun 02, 2018 12:35 am

Image
universe, you can't play the willfully ignorant, but partisan bleeding heart
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Postby Ampersand » Sat Jun 02, 2018 7:06 pm

awareness bump. tomorrow night!
high quality file in the hpn dropbox
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Jun 03, 2018 11:42 am

DEATH SPA is TONIGHT!
Check the hpn db folder to join!
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Jun 03, 2018 4:20 pm

Ampersand wrote:DEATH SPA is TONIGHT!
Check the hpn db folder to join!
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Jun 03, 2018 8:12 pm

2 hours until showtime!
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Jun 03, 2018 9:46 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION: Death Spa
Image
https://webchat.freenode.net/
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Jun 03, 2018 10:04 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION: Death Spa
Image
https://webchat.freenode.net/
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Jun 03, 2018 11:39 pm

Code: Select all
[22:13] <@Ampersand_> 3
[22:13] <@Ampersand_> 2
[22:13] <@Ampersand_> 1
[22:13] <besoin> Fly KLM
[22:13] <Trebbers> Dutch Spa
[22:13] <deathdonna> woah bold font chocie for the sign
[22:13] <@Ampersand_> more of a moonbody myself
[22:13] <dan2> thought it just said HEALTHS
[22:13] <besoin> travolta's club
[22:14] <Trebbers> ahahhaha
[22:14] <laserblast> okay that was actually cool as shit
[22:14] <impdentist> WHOA
[22:14] <dan2> sick
[22:14] <Trebbers> five bloody stars
[22:14] <deathdonna> i'm already so pleased
[22:14] <besoin> bodes well
[22:14] <deathdonna> lol bummiller
[22:14] <laserblast> ah yes, the bum miller and the butrick
[22:14] <impdentist> these names
[22:14] <besoin> bummiller, bakke, butrick
[22:15] <deathdonna> is this an interpretive aerobic studio?
[22:15] <lhs> this is just an art exhibit
[22:15] <bob511> Oh, Foree.
[22:15] <dan2> one of the cleanest death spas I've ever been in
[22:15] <besoin> the person who designed the max on saved by the bell designed this gym
[22:16] <Trebbers> Yeah, sorta a mystery what some of this shit would do
[22:16] <laserblast> Are we sure this movie sucks because the first two minutes have been cool as fuck.
[22:16] <besoin> i'm so excited
[22:16] <dan2> what a feeling
[22:16] <deathdonna> lol
[22:17] <besoin> mitch paradise
[22:17] <bob511> Red Light District Health Club
[22:17] <lhs> do some koyaanisquats
[22:17] <laserblast> lol lhs
[22:17] <@Ampersand_> lol lhs
[22:17] <Trebbers> Now get blasted in the gym
[22:17] <deathdonna> oh sure just leave your litter
[22:18] <laserblast> marvin gaye? no, marvin straight
[22:18] <deathdonna> ah yes, the lisa frank security system
[22:18] <besoin> heh
[22:18] <bob511> Heh
[22:18] <besoin> groundhog's day party
[22:18] <lhs> when the world is your trapper keeper
[22:18] <@Ampersand_> sterilized by mist
[22:19] <Trebbers> Really
[22:19] <Trebbers> Anti masturbation system
[22:19] <besoin> it's either the spa or the oj, nicole
[22:19] <deathdonna> is she getting gas chambered?
[22:20] <lhs> death spaz
[22:20] <besoin> how often are you this
[22:20] <@Ampersand_> saunabody heard her screams?
[22:20] <Trebbers> waoh
[22:20] <bob511> Why is the TV glow red?
[22:20] <deathdonna> most of the time
[22:20] <besoin> don't johnson
[22:20] <lhs> can we go back to that fucked up dream (?) for a sec
[22:21] <bob511> Oh, Thrifty.
[22:21] <deathdonna> Power Ballad from Drive Angry
[22:21] <bob511> Stop for ice cream.
[22:21] <Trebbers> Mail a letter real quick
[22:21] <besoin> tough seinfeld
[22:21] <deathdonna> was that a naked patient on a gurney?
[22:22] <Trebbers> ahah
[22:22] <deathdonna> shouldn't this be a sterile room?
[22:22] <bob511> Captain Marvel's less coordinated sister.
[22:22] <@Ampersand_> low-grade mummy, thankfully
[22:22] <Trebbers> "Treat her as you would a soft cheese"
[22:22] <deathdonna> lol
[22:22] <@Ampersand_> heh
[22:22] <bob511> Trash product placement.
[22:22] <deathdonna> on to happier times
[22:23] <lhs> love to work out at sex gym
[22:23] <deathdonna> is that a rainbow clit?
[22:23] <impdentist> wipe it down dude
[22:23] <@Ampersand_> yeah just imagine having to clean this room up at night
[22:23] <besoin> i hope there's a #memphisgroup tag on the imdb
[22:23] <dan2> that shirt's probably worth $300 now
[22:23] <Trebbers> Classic Marvin
[22:23] <deathdonna> his shirt
[22:24] <impdentist> weird camera
[22:24] <@Ampersand_> Classic Security State
[22:24] <besoin> HAL9000SPA
[22:24] <impdentist> pretty sophisticated system
[22:24] <laserblast> joan walsh: "increase the resistance?"
[22:25] <lhs> more foot traffic in this place than a damn airport
[22:25] <bob511> Yeah, quitting Twitter was the right move.
[22:25] <laserblast> oh my god bob i'm gonna go for a walk and think about my life now
[22:26] <bob511> Sorry. :(
[22:26] <besoin> is this lady that lady from the matrix
[22:26] <laserblast> WEIRD APPLIANCE
[22:27] <Trebbers> ha
[22:27] <lhs> NASpA
[22:27] <bob511> "You know, coughing."
[22:27] <@Ampersand_> refreshingly honest criminal
[22:27] <Trebbers> what
[22:27] <besoin> interesting system
[22:27] <deathdonna> i like her
[22:27] <lhs> it's a banner he made in print shop
[22:28] <Trebbers> Just logs from an erotic BBS
[22:28] <dan2> do you really need a supercomputer to turn on showers and increase bike resistance?
[22:28] <Trebbers> ahaha
[22:28] <laserblast> i mean how many times did she need to jump.
[22:28] <impdentist> well and to tighten screws on diving boards
[22:28] <@Ampersand_> this is what you get for having computer-controlled diving boards
[22:28] <bob511> Sgt. Stone
[22:29] <deathdonna> dust for prints in a pool?
[22:29] <deathdonna> i need this soundtrack
[22:29] <besoin> jock violence
[22:30] <lhs> bonsoir, i am jacques violence
[22:30] <deathdonna> lol
[22:30] <besoin> i think they ate at this place in white man's burden
[22:30] <Trebbers> aha
[22:30] <@Ampersand_> "i think this isn't a hamburger"
[22:30] <impdentist> haha
[22:31] <Trebbers> Random football
[22:31] <Trebbers> yessssss
[22:31] <impdentist> "anyway, let's table that for now"
[22:31] <@Ampersand_> this is where Wiseau got it from
[22:31] <besoin> very the room
[22:31] <Trebbers> What the fuck
[22:31] <deathdonna> bass theme from throwing the football
[22:31] <impdentist> what in the
[22:31] <besoin> there's a mardi gras party
[22:31] <impdentist> oh bye mark
[22:31] <besoin> read the signs, guys!
[22:31] <@Ampersand_> i mean, who recognizes ashes anyway?
[22:31] <Trebbers> ahaha
[22:32] <dan2> Murder Gras
[22:32] <besoin> here we go
[22:32] <impdentist> this scene is more like breen material
[22:32] <besoin> came mit the frame
[22:32] <lhs> i dreamed of a wheelchair mod for skyrim
[22:32] <@Ampersand_> i'll take this moment to remind ya'll that the alternate title for this movie is "Witch Bitch"
[22:33] <impdentist> hey no horseplay!
[22:33] <deathdonna> wake me up, before you go go
[22:33] <deathdonna> Witch Bitch is my tinder name
[22:33] <dan2> if only I could have a bond like this
[22:33] <impdentist> they go back and forth from athletic competition to discussions of murder suspects very quickly
[22:33] <deathdonna> wait wut
[22:33] <bob511> Beta male.
[22:33] <Trebbers> Oh no
[22:33] <lhs> is he gay? is that what that means?
[22:33] <besoin> this movie is good
[22:34] <deathdonna> yeah, i think so lhs
[22:34] <dan2> Big Bird really's got moves
[22:34] <@Ampersand_> i'm blu-ray
[22:34] <@Ampersand_> you're hd-dvd
[22:34] <impdentist> uh you still shouldn't put your hand in an active blender
[22:35] <deathdonna> oh all over my food
[22:35] <@Ampersand_> the new age of Aquarius
[22:35] <besoin> is this how aerobics works
[22:35] <@Ampersand_> that VEST
[22:35] <impdentist> oh no his office is in snake island!
[22:35] <@Ampersand_> oh wow another
[22:35] <bob511> Vests.
[22:35] <Trebbers> Is this going to be a building on a burial ground thing
[22:35] <besoin> uh oh
[22:35] <lhs> the spa was built on an ancient indian hotsprings
[22:36] <besoin> this guy's driving a submarine
[22:36] <bob511> Looks like an expensive Battleship board.
[22:36] <deathdonna> ooooohhhh snap
[22:36] <besoin> porky's 8: death spa
[22:36] <@Ampersand_> Das Bonmot
[22:36] <Trebbers> ....
[22:37] <besoin> this scene is 23 minutes
[22:37] <@Ampersand_> even the shower feels dirty
[22:37] <laserblast> FUCK
[22:37] <impdentist> hidden air jets?
[22:37] <besoin> the memphis group strikes again
[22:37] <dan2> must have stepped on the trap tiles in the floor of the shower
[22:37] <besoin> was that that tree from twin peaks
[22:37] <impdentist> uhhhh
[22:37] <besoin> is that karyn parsons
[22:37] <deathdonna> wait they just got attacked and they want a threesome?
[22:37] <@Ampersand_> problem was there was no caulk in the shower
[22:38] <bob511> ...
[22:38] <deathdonna> that's not what he meant by extended member-ship
[22:38] <dan2> "3 free months of the place that almost scalded me to death? Sweet!"
[22:38] <impdentist> damn how many ladies is this guy fuckin
[22:38] <@Ampersand_> TWO shirts
[22:38] <@Ampersand_> a Flintstonehead
[22:38] <besoin> here goes porn slater
[22:39] <deathdonna> that's not how reps work
[22:39] <impdentist> ah
[22:39] <deathdonna> wut
[22:39] <Trebbers> what
[22:39] <bob511> Full of tomatoes.
[22:39] <dan2> brings a whole new meaning to ripped
[22:39] <besoin> that's not how bodies work
[22:39] <deathdonna> lol dan
[22:39] <bob511> "You're going to ruin what's unique about the club: the gory maimings and deaths."
[22:40] <lhs> technology is bad and scary
[22:40] <impdentist> so is this a mardi gras party where people work out?
[22:40] <deathdonna> can we discuss this shirt
[22:40] <deathdonna> how is the mardi gras party so important they can't close?
[22:40] <bob511> "Aren't you supposed to be reffing a soccer match?"
[22:40] <lhs> boobs, donna
[22:40] <deathdonna> oh right sorry
[22:41] <@Ampersand_> omg
[22:41] <deathdonna> oh.....
[22:41] <impdentist> "it's 3 free months of health club membership"
[22:41] <deathdonna> i need a gif dan
[22:41] <impdentist> oh come on
[22:41] <deathdonna> please
[22:41] <dan2> don't take the blindfold off until you've finished eating
[22:41] <@Ampersand_> why did he light the candles
[22:41] <laserblast> I think coming on is the idea, dentist
[22:41] <Trebbers> 3 1/2 Months
[22:41] <deathdonna> lol
[22:41] <impdentist> she's already making blind jokes
[22:42] <deathdonna> what?
[22:42] <lhs> FORGET IT
[22:42] <Trebbers> Like what time is it supposed to be
[22:43] <deathdonna> death o'clock
[22:43] <laserblast> LOCKER UP LOCKER UP LOCKER UP
[22:43] <lhs> time to get a bra that fits correctly
[22:43] <dan2> goddamn it lb
[22:43] <besoin> what was that
[22:43] <deathdonna> how did she scream if she got stabbedin the throat
[22:44] <bob511> Should have switched her glasses with the Groucho ones.
[22:44] <Trebbers> How polite
[22:44] <impdentist> please!
[22:44] <besoin> thermonuclear war
[22:44] <dan2> logging on to bodybuildingforums
[22:44] <impdentist> how did she get in there
[22:45] <Trebbers> "Subject: Anyone else having this problem with their spa?"
[22:45] <impdentist> oh!
[22:45] <dan2> Phantom of the Spapera
[22:45] <deathdonna> lol
[22:45] <besoin> uh
[22:45] <deathdonna> lame
[22:46] <besoin> UH
[22:46] <deathdonna> that's a lot of skin
[22:46] <impdentist> was she just wearing the costume around
[22:46] <Trebbers> ahahhaha
[22:46] <dan2> Hot Wheels
[22:46] <@Ampersand_> ahh memories
[22:46] <deathdonna> i cannot with her eye patches
[22:46] <dan2> she should at least get a sharpie and draw in some pupils
[22:47] <impdentist> why did she have the light on
[22:47] <Trebbers> Tell me more face
[22:48] <dan2> and he can tell all that from that one urine sample, wow
[22:48] <deathdonna> Jim Henson's Death Spa
[22:48] <Trebbers> ah dan
[22:48] <Trebbers> "But your sister did, amirite?"
[22:48] <dan2> *puts out cig in skulls mouth*
[22:48] <Trebbers> Oh wait his wife
[22:48] == coloursound [17782066@gateway/web/freenode/ip.23.120.32.102] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[22:48] <@Ampersand_> a perfect likeness
[22:49] <dan2> "oh yeah, lotta thetons in this"
[22:49] <deathdonna> see, this is why we need abortion rights
[22:49] <deathdonna> or else people die in spas
[22:49] <besoin> it was kerosene, you hack
[22:49] == coloursound [17782066@gateway/web/freenode/ip.23.120.32.102] has quit [Client Quit]
[22:49] <bob511> He waited until after his wife immolated before sleeping with many, many women.
[22:49] <dan2> as opposed to the instantly recognizable ashes?
[22:50] <bob511> "That's what she thought of your pubic hair."
[22:50] <impdentist> i have never heard of "papa bird" before
[22:50] <dan2> same
[22:50] <deathdonna> so she was crippled from giving birth to a kid she didn't want and he did
[22:50] <deathdonna> and he thinks she had no reason to be depressed?
[22:51] <deathdonna> wait what is his job?
[22:51] <deathdonna> and what's beeping and buzzing?
[22:51] <dan2> I don't know but I think I'd be great at it
[22:52] <impdentist> wait is the dude fucking his dead twin
[22:52] <deathdonna> uhhhhhh, is the brother fucking his sister's ashes?
[22:52] <deathdonna> how would he know it's her?
[22:53] <dan2> is it normal for a gym or spa to have a really low light neon area?
[22:54] <Trebbers> ahhhh
[22:54] <deathdonna> fuck that's not good
[22:54] <deathdonna> htat's what she's wearing to her threesome?
[22:54] <@Ampersand_> No Try, Only Do
[22:55] <dan2> heh
[22:55] <Trebbers> what
[22:55] <deathdonna> Indiana JOnes and the Spa of Doom
[22:55] <@Ampersand_> boing boing boing
[22:55] <besoin> gyms and their industrial basements
[22:56] <dan2> that's the killer plucking a rubber band next to his mouth
[22:56] <impdentist> the furnace powers the computer system
[22:57] <besoin> felled by water
[22:57] <@Ampersand_> "ugh. i taste good"
[22:58] <bob511> "Also, several of the customers keep hanging."
[22:58] <deathdonna> love that 50s diner door
[22:58] <laserblast> ah yes, one gigabyte of ram should do the trick
[22:59] <deathdonna> i kind of want her outfit
[23:02] <besoin> hm, she's not on the 1.2th floor
[23:03] <bob511> A pair of psychologists?
[23:03] <besoin> what was the para-copay
[23:04] <impdentist> what could go wrong
[23:05] <Trebbers> what happened
[23:05] <Trebbers> oh the redheaded lady
[23:06] <lhs> dead lift
[23:06] <bob511> Oh
[23:06] <Trebbers> Fell all the way down the the 2nd sub basement
[23:06] <Trebbers> !!!
[23:06] <dan2> well then
[23:07] <deathdonna> is he sleeping on a sleeping bag?
[23:08] <bob511> How is there not one Nagel print in that house?
[23:10] <lhs> smooch
[23:11] <deathdonna> oh dear
[23:11] <impdentist> now we're talkin
[23:11] <Trebbers> waoh
[23:11] <@Ampersand_> no?
[23:11] <lhs> looking for me, a giant crotch?
[23:12] <deathdonna> mr clean goes day spa
[23:12] <laserblast> generator (drank) screws (drank)
[23:14] <bob511> He lives with a howler monkey?
[23:14] <Trebbers> Bra : Pass
[23:14] <besoin> trying to forget sarah marshall
[23:14] <bob511> "Six foot, 135 pounds, great legs."
[23:16] <besoin> sexual assault in progress
[23:16] <deathdonna> Gym Life in the 80s was wild
[23:16] <besoin> shazaam
[23:17] <deathdonna> ah yes, mardi gras's traditional pirate cosutme
[23:17] <besoin> melania
[23:17] <impdentist> what move was that
[23:18] <deathdonna> is this halloween or mardi gras?
[23:19] <impdentist> there's a lot going on here
[23:19] <lhs> seasons change, michael
[23:20] <deathdonna> mmmm, gym sushi
[23:21] <besoin> come on, that looks like melania
[23:21] <@Ampersand_> the past is toasty
[23:22] <impdentist> Penus Penus Penus Penus
[23:22] <besoin> very quiet dot matrix printer
[23:22] <deathdonna> death by demon face
[23:23] <lhs> what did the mall ever do to you
[23:23] <besoin> get this woman a crystal light
[23:23] <deathdonna> that's a clown move bro
[23:24] <bob511> What
[23:24] <Trebbers> grody
[23:24] <lhs> overripe
[23:24] <impdentist> very powerful computer
[23:24] <dan2> whoa
[23:26] <lhs> feel the burn, laura
[23:26] <deathdonna> move faster bor
[23:26] <lhs> that's a salad bar
[23:27] <besoin> yeah, cpr
[23:27] <Trebbers> He just loves the taste of bacon
[23:27] <dan2> sign me up
[23:27] <@Ampersand_> "let
[23:27] <@Ampersand_> 's powerlift him"
[23:27] <deathdonna> i'll have what she's having
[23:28] <Trebbers> that dj
[23:28] <deathdonna> yessss
[23:28] <Trebbers> Fat guy stunt
[23:28] <impdentist> wait is that some sort of battery powered blender
[23:28] <@Ampersand_> i swear, this gag USED to work
[23:29] <@Ampersand_> when juicing goes too far
[23:29] <dan2> *pulls out perfectly fine hand* "Gotcha!"
[23:29] <Trebbers> *starts up again*
[23:29] <@Ampersand_> this party is lit
[23:29] <lhs> quality blender tbh
[23:30] <deathdonna> see this is why i don't take vitamins
[23:30] <dan2> oh man
[23:30] <Trebbers> go movie
[23:30] <lhs> mm, vitamins and champagne and fish
[23:30] <Trebbers> "Take me down to the river"
[23:30] <impdentist> the fish?
[23:30] <dan2> do they serve baracuda at this spa?
[23:30] <bob511> Quality way to go.
[23:30] <laserblast> eel yeah
[23:31] <besoin> maybe go out the front door?
[23:32] <impdentist> do these people not know that multiple people have died at this party
[23:32] <bob511> Fletch Doesn't Live
[23:32] <impdentist> whoa
[23:32] <dan2> ah
[23:32] <besoin> heh
[23:32] <lhs> yikes
[23:33] <laserblast> And on voiceover, Vincent Price!
[23:33] <deathdonna> they'll all laugh at you
[23:33] <besoin> COMPUTER
[23:33] <@Ampersand_> and i'll show you the vegan alternative
[23:33] <deathdonna> imean, it's too late now
[23:33] <impdentist> wait what
[23:34] <@Ampersand_> hell of a way to get your rocks off
[23:34] <impdentist> i her soul trapped in his shoe
[23:34] <dan2> don't cross the streams!
[23:34] <besoin> rated pg&e
[23:34] <lhs> help computer
[23:34] <laserblast> (noob saibot voice) TOASTY
[23:34] <impdentist> oh no fire, her one weakness!
[23:34] <Trebbers> Was he shocking the pendant
[23:34] <deathdonna> my saaacrafice....
[23:34] <deathdonna> so i mean, they're all still gonna die
[23:35] <impdentist> turns out it was just a terribly unsafe gym in the first place
[23:35] <besoin> shouldn't have hired dj great white
[23:35] <bob511> Guy Getting Smushed to Death is a fun credit to have.
[23:36] <impdentist> ahahaha
[23:36] <dan2> oh my god
[23:36] <Trebbers> ahaha
[23:36] <laserblast> oh my goooooddddd
[23:36] <besoin> uber is gonna have surge pricing
[23:36] <bob511> Sure, shoot her once she's black(ened).
[23:36] <lhs> heh
[23:36] <dan2> and that's why you don't build on an ancient jock burial ground
[23:37] <@Ampersand_> oh this is a jam
[23:37] <impdentist> OH MAN DEATH SPA THEME
[23:37] <dan2> and a rare zappa cut to take us out
[23:37] <@Ampersand_> lol
[23:37] <lhs> they shoot horses, don't they
[23:37] <@Ampersand_> they zap '
[23:37] <@Ampersand_> um
[23:37] <dan2> good work by "Ace"
[23:37] <Trebbers> Way better than the premise would suggest
[23:38] <laserblast> YOU CAN SPA IF YOU WANT TO / YOU CAN BURN YOUR FRIENDS' BEHINDS / BUT IF THEY DON'T ZAP AND WELL THEY DON'T ZAP / WELL THEY AIN'T NO FRIEND OF MINE
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Postby Ampersand » Tue Jun 05, 2018 9:16 am

This Thursday,

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Postby Ampersand » Wed Jun 06, 2018 4:15 pm

Awareness bump!
Tomorrow night!
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Postby laserblast » Wed Jun 06, 2018 10:13 pm

ren ... na?
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Postby Autarch » Wed Jun 06, 2018 10:44 pm

did the db password change?
Sent from my Lenovo
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Jun 07, 2018 10:23 am

TONIGHT @ 2200 EDT: The Return of Renna in GAME BOX 1.0
PM me or check the hpn db to join!
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Jun 07, 2018 2:05 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT @ 2200 EDT: The Return of Renna in GAME BOX 1.0
PM me or check the hpn db to join!
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Jun 07, 2018 6:11 pm

Ampersand wrote:
Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT @ 2200 EDT: The Return of Renna in GAME BOX 1.0
PM me or check the hpn db to join!
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Jun 07, 2018 8:58 pm

1 hour until GAME TIME!
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Jun 07, 2018 9:45 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION: Game Box 1.0
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https://webchat.freenode.net/
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Jun 07, 2018 9:58 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION: Game Box 1.0
Image
https://webchat.freenode.net/
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Jun 07, 2018 11:38 pm

Code: Select all
[22:14] <dan2> let me crack open my gamer fuel
[22:14] <@Ampersand_> 3
[22:14] <laserblast> you got a monster!?!
[22:14] <@Ampersand_> 2
[22:14] <@Ampersand_> 1
[22:15] <dan2> gotta keep the senses sharp
[22:15] <besoin> is this the crystal method
[22:15] <lhs> crystal pepsi method
[22:15] <donnamartin> oh i forgot my Code Red
[22:15] <laserblast> i'm a fake firestarter. you're a fake firestarter.
[22:15] <donnamartin> tho i have red wine, same thing
[22:15] <@Ampersand_> totally awesome video gaaaaaames
[22:15] <@Ampersand_> stuck at 89%
[22:16] <dan2> back when movies had loading times
[22:16] <dan2> glad that's a thing of the past
[22:16] <impdentist> shit can i get 200
[22:16] <Trebbers> It's been
[22:16] <impdentist> ok 300
[22:16] <besoin> 1:30
[22:16] <dan2> oh my ggod
[22:16] <impdentist> wait
[22:16] <donnamartin> is he having a seizure?
[22:16] <besoin> 2 is coming imp
[22:16] <dan2> I think he was singing barenaked ladies
[22:16] <Trebbers> violent jerk sesh
[22:16] <dan2> 2:00 now!
[22:16] <besoin> 2:00
[22:17] <besoin> he's in trump's bowels
[22:17] <impdentist> thx i'm good
[22:17] <@Ampersand_> he gamed too hard
[22:17] <Trebbers> Is that an XFL poster above his bed
[22:17] <dan2> what happens if you die in the game and the game is in a dream?
[22:17] <dan2> do you still die for real?
[22:17] <dan2> or are you double dead?
[22:17] <besoin> i can't drive...55
[22:17] <donnamartin> so is this just freddy but with video games?
[22:17] <laserblast> dan, thank you. may i point you in the direction o-- (INSANE INCEPTION AIR HORN)
[22:17] <@Ampersand_> freddy got fingered, yes
[22:18] <laserblast> daddy would you like some xbox? daddy would you like some xbox?
[22:18] <besoin> delivering for amazon
[22:18] <dan2> great Smuggler's Run homage
[22:18] <besoin> oh hi cud nylon
[22:18] <dan2> ah
[22:18] <laserblast> np: hideaway lights setting a world record in pole position
[22:18] <impdentist> weird drive time show
[22:18] <@Ampersand_> mailman is glitching
[22:19] <impdentist> "his internal organs were severed with no break to the skin! BOIOIOIOING
[22:19] <besoin> amazon holding usps hostage
[22:19] <donnamartin> michael bay should get some score credits here
[22:19] <besoin> thanks for the exposition, shock jocks
[22:20] <dan2> I'm talking about ethics in gaming journalism my man
[22:20] <impdentist> is this before chris hayes got big
[22:20] <besoin> oh hi renna
[22:20] <Trebbers> Andy Partridge game tester
[22:21] <donnamartin> they've been working for 2 min
[22:21] <lhs> ben franklin's hanging out there
[22:21] <impdentist> pretty disappointed with the direction the soundtrack has taken
[22:21] <@Ampersand_> ew don't touch him
[22:21] <@Ampersand_> we know where that sweatshirt has been
[22:21] <Trebbers> 5 hours later
[22:21] <dan2> must have run out of battery
[22:22] <Trebbers> Metafartz
[22:22] <@Ampersand_> "i've gotta stay home and part my hair"
[22:22] <impdentist> wait i'm just realizing that this guy is an adult
[22:22] <impdentist> presumably
[22:22] <lhs> are you a big enough mailbox to rescue the president
[22:22] <Trebbers> 6 pack of fleshlights finally came
[22:22] <@Ampersand_> lol lhs
[22:23] <Trebbers> ahahhahahhah
[22:23] <besoin> it's a diadem
[22:23] <@Ampersand_> *other head
[22:23] <impdentist> By Royale Decree, If Thou Wish to Playe
[22:23] <lhs> knew he was a beta
[22:24] <dan2> Madcatz has really outdone themselves with this one
[22:24] <laserblast> lol
[22:25] <impdentist> has anyone ever actually played video games like this
[22:25] <besoin> easy charlie
[22:25] <@Ampersand_> "it's for, uh, later"
[22:25] <donnamartin> wow
[22:25] <donnamartin> #metoo charlie
[22:25] <Trebbers> "This videogame wants me to collect 10 upskirts"
[22:25] <besoin> nice casting on this lead
[22:25] <@Ampersand_> the charisma oozes
[22:25] <donnamartin> the founders of gamergate
[22:26] <besoin> when does he drink pepsi max and turn into mcwop
[22:26] <lhs> gonna grill up some hot pockets
[22:26] <Trebbers> ahahah
[22:26] <donnamartin> what
[22:26] <donnamartin> lol besoin
[22:26] <laserblast> i told you not to keep the zapper loaded
[22:26] <impdentist> this really strains credulity
[22:26] <impdentist> all of it
[22:27] <Trebbers> "Girlfriend got shot. Game of Time Crisis got out of hand."
[22:27] <impdentist> IT'S A LIGHT GUN FOR THE ORIGINAL NES, IT'S BUNDLED WITH THE SYSTEM
[22:27] <donnamartin> movies always have these videos and like, who does this?
[22:27] <@Ampersand_> yeah why can't he just make a sextape like everybody else
[22:27] <impdentist> take the pic dude
[22:27] <impdentist> come on
[22:27] <laserblast> "no, no, i said WIIMOTE not EMOTE" - the director
[22:27] <impdentist> you're obviously gonna
[22:27] <Trebbers> A frame is going to be a npc
[22:28] <@Ampersand_> lol blast
[22:28] <Trebbers> Hate that this voice sounds like David Cross
[22:28] <impdentist> oh man
[22:28] <@Ampersand_> omg killed by cop?
[22:28] <laserblast> this movie just got way better
[22:28] <dan2> STEP AWAY FROM THE METER
[22:29] <Trebbers> IT WAS AN ACCIDENT
[22:29] <donnamartin> what they got shot for breaking into the water plant?
[22:29] <lhs> died hacking into the mall
[22:29] <dan2> she was frolicking in a very threatening way, he had no choice
[22:29] <impdentist> "no really, i mean it"
[22:29] <besoin> girl meets underworld
[22:29] <donnamartin> screenplay by jaxen, 13 years old
[22:29] <donnamartin> lol
[22:29] <Trebbers> A cop charged in a shooting? Science fiction
[22:29] <@Ampersand_> Pongland
[22:29] <impdentist> did he question whether he should plug it into his tv first
[22:30] <@Ampersand_> Judgment House, perhaps?
[22:30] <dan2> Just everyone doing crimes all the time
[22:30] <lhs> harem anime thing
[22:30] <dan2> "Alien Crime Spree"
[22:30] <Trebbers> Alien Planet looks like fucking Zombieland
[22:30] <laserblast> oh no.
[22:30] <donnamartin> oh yeahhhh
[22:30] <dan2> TRU CRIME: STREETS OF CRIMELAND
[22:30] <Trebbers> ahahh
[22:30] <@Ampersand_> they contoured his face so that he looks like polygons
[22:30] <@Ampersand_> insane
[22:31] <impdentist> just like real life
[22:31] <Trebbers> Contoured some cheekbones out of nothing
[22:31] <dan2> the mission: crimes
[22:31] <impdentist> oh gracious
[22:31] <Trebbers> A call from the Big Mac
[22:31] <lhs> he walks just like a gta character
[22:31] <@Ampersand_> that is how they walk in GTA games
[22:31] <donnamartin> mayor mcheese was after the hamburgler
[22:31] <@Ampersand_> lol yes
[22:31] <laserblast> lol
[22:31] <Trebbers> ahah
[22:31] <impdentist> FUCK
[22:31] <besoin> finally got to beat up his black friend
[22:31] <@Ampersand_> ahhhh
[22:31] <dan2> yess
[22:31] <donnamartin> oh irony!
[22:32] <dan2> YEAH
[22:32] <dan2> "as long as its a perfectly rectangular building"
[22:32] <lhs> to look like neil patrick harris as a member of nsync
[22:32] <Trebbers> womp womp womp womp
[22:32] <@Ampersand_> wowow
[22:33] <donnamartin> wut
[22:33] <@Ampersand_> this is doing things to my brain
[22:33] <dan2> Just some random members of the Grey Woman Group dancing along
[22:34] <Trebbers> shittttt
[22:34] <laserblast> even games that kill you in real life have fuckin fetch quests
[22:34] <@Ampersand_> "sorry, pterodactyl caught in my throat"
[22:34] <donnamartin> stephen dorf should be here
[22:34] <dan2> "I wrote it on this condom"
[22:34] <impdentist> how come everyone in the line has a face
[22:35] <donnamartin> what are these songs
[22:35] <impdentist> god this is all original music huh
[22:35] <lhs> off-white zombie
[22:35] <@Ampersand_> Bob Zoombie
[22:35] <laserblast> SLAM in the back of my MOTORCYCLE
[22:35] <donnamartin> are we *sure* a 13 yo oy didn't write this?
[22:35] <besoin> is this that chuggo video
[22:35] <dan2> Bob Ghoulbie
[22:35] <@Ampersand_> lol besoin
[22:35] <impdentist> besoin i was thinking the same thing
[22:35] <besoin> chuggowould
[22:36] <laserblast> how are we gonna get through 2 more of these games in 80 minutes
[22:36] <dan2> love how the bike can't turn at all
[22:36] <@Ampersand_> the graphics are shit that's how i feel
[22:36] <impdentist> wait is he actually narrating this to us
[22:36] <donnamartin> is he in a 40s serial or a video game
[22:36] <laserblast> i 100% cannot tell whether this is diegetic or not
[22:37] <impdentist> omg
[22:37] <donnamartin> dentist i just said that out loud while rubbing my temple
[22:38] <dan2> at least take the hat
[22:38] <dan2> that thing's gotta have mad stats
[22:38] <donnamartin> oh no a girl
[22:38] <donnamartin> what do i do?
[22:38] <impdentist> these guys have clearly never played grand theft auto but think they know exactly what it's like
[22:38] <dan2> I believe you mean a dame Donna
[22:38] <dan2> this is half GTA and half Max Payne
[22:39] <impdentist> did he change into another hoodie
[22:39] <Trebbers> Has to make his 5 minute shift at the game office
[22:39] <impdentist> if he's not careful he's going to miss lunch time
[22:39] <besoin> this is the last job charlie ever got, save for one short
[22:40] <donnamartin> is that the great hambino?
[22:40] <besoin> yeah, patrick renna
[22:40] <impdentist> "you look more like crap than usual"
[22:40] <lhs> thanks for noticing
[22:40] <@Ampersand_> honestly, he looks improved
[22:40] <donnamartin> a guy on metro told me that once
[22:40] <besoin> to think this goon was sabrina's love interest
[22:41] <Trebbers> Is that green screened
[22:42] <@Ampersand_> "did you bite me, charlie?"
[22:42] <besoin> this movie predicted facebook
[22:43] <lhs> "let me play my ex-box"
[22:43] <Trebbers> ahah
[22:43] <@Ampersand_> hehe
[22:43] <besoin> ah cmon topanga
[22:43] <@Ampersand_> lol
[22:44] <impdentist> promotional consideration by ford
[22:44] <@Ampersand_> barf
[22:44] <laserblast> oh god
[22:44] <laserblast> and yeah this looks super green screened
[22:44] <besoin> also predicted makeup contouring youtubes/instagrams
[22:45] <donnamartin> women, amirite
[22:45] <besoin> a cross-tgif romance
[22:45] <dan2> for some reason I read that as predicted makeup youtubes and thought it was ai doing makeup tutorials
[22:45] <dan2> which would probably be sick
[22:45] <impdentist> wait is the guy someone
[22:45] <besoin> harvey from sabrina the teenage witch
[22:45] <impdentist> oh yeah someone said that
[22:45] <donnamartin> soundbeat?
[22:45] <besoin> very imaginative
[22:46] <dan2> wow, truly a world where anything is possible
[22:47] <laserblast> a'ight pulp fiction
[22:47] <Trebbers> yesss
[22:47] <Trebbers> nooo
[22:47] <dan2> "oh no, this dialogue again"
[22:48] <@Ampersand_> ya gotta hand it to this movie: nothing has ever or will ever look like this again
[22:48] <laserblast> the game is pretty reasonable for a murderous game
[22:48] <Trebbers> *picks up game again*
[22:48] <besoin> no way this guy's shower door is this clean
[22:49] <Trebbers> It would be clean if he never used it
[22:49] <besoin> getting murdered does tend to stick with you
[22:49] <besoin> off to publix
[22:49] <impdentist> lol
[22:49] <dan2> lol besoin
[22:50] <besoin> easy on the creamer, boss
[22:50] <impdentist> uh boss, i found another bug
[22:51] <laserblast> lol
[22:51] <dan2> clean your Dvd man, your disc is skipping
[22:51] <besoin> uh, game, $4.25 for a mocha?
[22:51] <impdentist> i always hated escort missions
[22:52] <donnamartin> charlie's about as good at this as i am
[22:52] <Trebbers> TIME FOR LUNCH
[22:52] <besoin> these guys are really living the LA life
[22:52] <@Ampersand_> NO COFFEE OF COURSE NOT
[22:52] <besoin> drip coffee...lunch
[22:53] <laserblast> is this the best boss in the history of the shit flixe
[22:53] <impdentist> game, set waypoint to doctor
[22:53] <impdentist> is this a pediatrician
[22:53] <donnamartin> hehe horstein
[22:53] <Trebbers> Hornstein!
[22:53] <dan2> *Well, Dr. Mario is open, would that be alright?"
[22:53] <Trebbers> ah
[22:53] <lhs> they have a whole room for that
[22:54] <donnamartin> i think it was pretty clear something was wrong
[22:54] <impdentist> ed harris?
[22:55] <dan2> was that Peter Boyle?
[22:55] <impdentist> 1.73 damn
[22:55] <besoin> yeah
[22:55] <besoin> kill this cop
[22:55] <dan2> Office Michael Symon on patrol
[22:56] <Trebbers> "You ever get wet?"
[22:56] <impdentist> what is happening
[22:56] <donnamartin> waoh what
[22:56] <donnamartin> he was dating a 17 yo?
[22:56] <impdentist> "now if she had been a black kid, that would have made sense!"
[22:56] <@Ampersand_> do gamers hate cops? is that a thing?
[22:56] <impdentist> hackers do
[22:57] <besoin> he should swat this cop
[22:57] <lhs> usually hating cops involves going outside
[22:57] <impdentist> how come he wasn't playing the game all the way to the hospital
[22:57] <dan2> ah
[22:57] <besoin> my name is jonah
[22:57] <impdentist> the game narrative did not really explain this
[22:57] <donnamartin> i need this soundtrack
[22:58] <dan2> bash his head in
[22:58] <lhs> to live here is to live
[22:59] <besoin> whoa, venom crossover
[22:59] <dan2> he's getting invaded
[22:59] <impdentist> it's the bank robber from crime spree
[22:59] <Trebbers> Must be a monolith in the area
[22:59] <dan2> these zombies are glitching out real bad
[22:59] <lhs> you will go through your entire steam library
[23:00] <impdentist> can't wait for the american truck simulator level
[23:00] <impdentist> jungle?
[23:00] <besoin> jungle?
[23:00] <@Ampersand_> jungle of the mind
[23:00] <donnamartin> why can princess come wiht him to a new game if she's from crime spree?
[23:01] <besoin> or ao shun for that matter
[23:01] <lhs> a happy ending would be a sims cohabitation with her
[23:01] <dan2> I reccomend you consult the documentary Wreck-It Ralph
[23:01] <besoin> a true blood level
[23:02] <besoin> the professor will be his chill boss
[23:02] <donnamartin> aren't we all just characters in this elaborate video game we call life?
[23:03] <lhs> pete has joined your party
[23:03] <dan2> heh
[23:04] <Trebbers> Game said you have critically high levels of horseradish in your blood
[23:04] <besoin> haha
[23:04] <@Ampersand_> lol treb
[23:04] <donnamartin> woah patrick swayze about to get ghosted
[23:05] <besoin> those ghost ghosts terrify me
[23:05] <dan2> can they even eat you? they don't seem to have mouths
[23:05] <donnamartin> oh you don't want Final Destination
[23:05] <lhs> well excuuuuuse me, princess
[23:05] <donnamartin> broads, amirite
[23:05] <besoin> woke boyz
[23:06] <dan2> ahahaha
[23:06] <@Ampersand_> wow
[23:06] <besoin> a lost level
[23:06] <@Ampersand_> RIP Blue Mountain
[23:06] <lhs> quiet hill
[23:06] <dan2> "Computer, bring up gamefaqs"
[23:07] <besoin> he hasn't even tried the konami code
[23:07] <impdentist> these zombies can do kung fu on the ceiling
[23:08] <dan2> they did do a good job at capturing the empty colorless repetitive hallways and corridors of 2004 gaming
[23:08] <lhs> they're going to breakdance him to death
[23:09] <besoin> with a game genie you can unlock urkel and cody from step by step
[23:09] <besoin> all the tgif greats
[23:09] <Trebbers> "Why? It's 2004"
[23:11] <dan2> why is his voice all distorted now
[23:11] <donnamartin> they owe space invaders royalties
[23:11] <besoin> nooo
[23:11] <lhs> frogger in his throat
[23:11] <Trebbers> ahahahh
[23:12] <@Ampersand_> Aliens Ate My Forearm!
[23:12] <besoin> an english patient level
[23:12] <lhs> he's camping
[23:13] <donnamartin> YOU CAN'T MAKE ME EAT MY BROCCOLI
[23:13] <Trebbers> what
[23:13] <besoin> a cinnamon jelly belly
[23:13] <besoin> better grab that
[23:13] <dan2> BE ALL YOU CAN BE
[23:14] <besoin> turkish star wars had better effects than this
[23:14] <impdentist> just shoot him
[23:16] <besoin> just harvest his organs already
[23:16] <laserblast> so much for the aliens on alien planet
[23:16] <besoin> serendipity
[23:16] <dan2> *goron steals the heart when they aren't looking*
[23:17] <donnamartin> i'm going to need to see the score credits
[23:17] <lhs> she needs a phoenix down
[23:17] <besoin> GAAAMMEEEE
[23:17] <impdentist> you can waste health on dead party members?
[23:17] <impdentist> that's just poor game design
[23:18] <laserblast> rip topanga
[23:18] <donnamartin> um
[23:18] <@Ampersand_> I, Ow
[23:18] <besoin> i...i'm in ms-13?
[23:19] <donnamartin> oh my god
[23:19] <besoin> little solaris reference here
[23:19] <laserblast> wait this is ... a metaphor
[23:19] <donnamartin> this shit is a fucking metaphor
[23:19] <donnamartin> manic pixie gamer girl
[23:20] <dan2> "no, this is still the game, I'm still an alpha"
[23:20] <laserblast> this is an everclear album cover
[23:20] <impdentist> it's an ambush!
[23:21] <besoin> no way his boss wouldn't be there gently putting pop tart crumbles in his mouth
[23:21] <@Ampersand_> "but it's wrong. i'm used to not moving for days"
[23:21] <lhs> heh
[23:21] <impdentist> has his boss showed up in the game yet
[23:21] <besoin> nope
[23:21] <besoin> he didn't take his picture i guess
[23:21] <impdentist> i bet he's in charge of the game
[23:22] <lhs> game, open console and enable god mode
[23:22] <besoin> my patagonia tattoo!
[23:24] <laserblast> game. iddqd.
[23:24] == RIXXX [43f474a7@gateway/web/freenode/ip.67.244.116.167] has quit [Quit: Page closed]
[23:24] <dan2> "fuckin aimbot"
[23:25] <besoin> is ao shun an anagram or something
[23:25] <impdentist> "has uno"
[23:25] <impdentist> the number of hit points he has
[23:26] <donnamartin> amazing
[23:26] <laserblast> oh my god
[23:26] <impdentist> oh man in-game marketing
[23:26] <donnamartin> i'm not kate
[23:26] <besoin> the schindler's list strings
[23:27] <@Ampersand_> she can feel it in her oversized cartoon heart
[23:28] <Trebbers> flatline
[23:29] <impdentist> ah
[23:29] <laserblast> lol
[23:29] <besoin> transitions lenses!
[23:29] <dan2> they had to give him a saline drip filled with mountain dew, his body rejected everything else
[23:30] <besoin> heh
[23:30] <impdentist> "i love how you always play game boy and don't talk to me"
[23:30] <besoin> a kate replacement!
[23:30] <@Ampersand_> "roast beef. hold the horseradish"
[23:30] <lhs> he starts a 30-page thread about asking out his server
[23:30] <donnamartin> oh no he's gonna hit on the server too
[23:30] <besoin> heh
[23:31] <donnamartin> my eyes detached from rolling them
[23:31] <laserblast> nooooooooooo
[23:31] <@Ampersand_> hey, he doesn't even have to change!
[23:31] <@Ampersand_> that's growth
[23:31] <impdentist> but the bbq is tonight
[23:31] <laserblast> oh jesus christ
[23:31] <dan2> OK, he's definetly in another game now
[23:31] <@Ampersand_> daaaaamn who's this person who bathes??!
[23:31] <impdentist> who just leaves beers out on the table
[23:32] <impdentist> what if he beats it too
[23:32] <laserblast> hell yeah fuck the police
[23:32] <Trebbers> wait what
[23:32] <donnamartin> amazing
[23:32] <besoin> welp
[23:32] <@Ampersand_> in the end, it was all about ethics in policing
[23:32] <dan2> game made by Phrenology Systems
[23:32] <donnamartin> yes, these credits
[23:32] <impdentist> Patrick Kilpatrick
[23:32] <impdentist> god damn
[23:32] <besoin> disappointingly small role for renna
[23:33] <@Ampersand_> lol at them only being able to get Renna for a day
[23:33] <laserblast> Patrick Kilpatrick is the b-side to Cop Shoot Cop
[23:33] <impdentist> wait what
[23:33] <dan2> there were only like 8 characters in this, they must be listing the zombies
[23:33] <dan2> WORM MILLER
[23:33] <impdentist> how did i not know about actual renna
[23:33] <dan2> really?
[23:33] <besoin> you damned youngin'
[23:33] <impdentist> no i mean i know about him
[23:33] <impdentist> i did not know this movie was related to him
[23:34] <donnamartin> gonna have to ask laserblast for this soundtrack for xmas
[23:34] <impdentist> wtf i'm freaking out
[23:34] <besoin> he was the coworker
[23:34] <besoin> the "i didn't call you yesterday" guy
[23:34] <donnamartin> oh good, font i can read
[23:34] <besoin> great song
[23:34] <impdentist> i had no idea this was part of the renna legend
[23:35] <besoin> evalessance
[23:35] <impdentist> they blurred the credits like they blurred the actors to help them blend into the vg background
[23:35] <besoin> it's not, imp
[23:35] <impdentist> i'm so confused
[23:35] <besoin> patrick renna is just an actor, most famous for the sandlot
[23:35] <@Ampersand_> board renna =/= film renna
[23:35] <besoin> and the boarder looked like him, so people called him renna
[23:35] <besoin> (even though he didn't really look like him)
[23:35] <@Ampersand_> yeah not at all
[23:36] <impdentist> wow ok apparently this entire board character has gone commpletely over my head
[23:36] <donnamartin> the movie score feels ... unfocused
[23:36] <besoin> he's been gone since like 2009, imp
[23:36] <laserblast> dentist honestly don't worry about renna
[23:36] <laserblast> not worth it
[23:36] <impdentist> oh i don't
[23:36] <@Ampersand_> yeah, honest
[23:36] <Trebbers> Better for you to have as vague idea of board Renna as possible
[23:36] <@Ampersand_> the chicken nugget image is all you need
[23:37] <Trebbers> One perfect shot
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Ampersand
 
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Postby laserblast » Thu Jun 07, 2018 11:39 pm

ahaha way to leave in the shit talk there at the end
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